Just first quickly on training...muddling through the deload week that has no bench deload because my shoulders are just...weird. They're not in pain, they're just...noticeable in a way that they weren't before. No sense in pushing things now so...they'll just stay nice and rested and bench will be just fine without it. I'm sure.
I was poking around the internet tonight, juust doing some surfing and I came across something about Erik Chopin from The Biggest Loser. Erik was the winner of...Season 3 I think? He started on the ranch at a little over 400 pounds, lost a BUNCH and then at some point in 2009 came "out" that he had gained all the way back up to about 370.
How devestating for him, and my worst nightmare. It's the source of the fear, Ive known this for a long time - gaining the weight back. There really can be no going back!
So still surfing, I found where Erik's former trainer Bob paid him a visit. He said he was worried Bob would be let down or angry with him, he was embarassed to meet with him.
But Bob said some things to Erik that when I read, really resonated deeply with me,
Bob told him that he shouldn’t go back to the “strict life,” instead finding a balance he’d be able to do for the rest of his life.
“You know how to take it off and you know how to put it on — what you don’t know is how to live your everyday life,” Bob said.
Interstingly, I thought I had this down, I thought I had this down for a long time, but the truth is I don't. I wrote about this once before, about "maintenance." I thought I was "in maintenance" when i reached my goal weight, but I wasn't, I wasn't doing "everyday life" yet...I was living exactly the same as when I was "dieting."
Now some might argue that if you've truly made "a diet" your LIFESTYLE, then why WOULD it change? But I'm seeing now why, I'm experiencing now why it should change. Not drastically, but slowly I think, a balance needs to be struck...a little more freedom and a little more wiggle room. Because you can't do "the strict life," for forever...exactly as Bob said. And I made lots of noise about it the day I thought I finally GOT that. Well I guess I got that in theory that day, but what I didn't get was any of the tools I need to put it into practice...I never learned HOW to make it happen.
Quite simply...I don't know how to DO 'everyday life."
For SO LONG I dieted, I did it for SO LONG tht I only know two ways to eat.
The way that didn't work, and the way that did.
The in between..that's the everyday. I have a lot of work to do, because THAT door is hidden under a lot of fear.