Despite all my best efforts to get down and stay at 136, I got there for about 47 seconds and promptly worked my way steadily back up to...141. Seriously, I thought, WTFF (yes there's an extra F!)?!
I maintained relative composure, tried to think through some things rationally. TOM was probably definitely a factor, the clean cheat meal I cooked for myself last weekend. Cheeseburger, sweet potato fries, and chocolate/pb dessert concoction from Hungry Girl that was less than 200 calories (but mmmm yummy). Very clean and hardly an overboard cheat meal, especially considering the last I'd had was in late March.
Sure sure those things played a role, but then it didn't go away. Typical Cathy, never has a cheat meal even when it's really needed because this ALWAYS happens. Gain 3 pounds and it takes 3 weeks to make them go away again. I feel punished by my body, so instead of feeling badly about it, I just don't do it. It's a cycle..and one I'm apparently reinforcing unintentionally.
I talked with RC and wondered outloud if the INfrequency of refeeding with a cheat meal is actually making this cycle worse. Meaning the longer I hold out between these meals, the worse the retention gets, the longer I hold out for the next one, the worse it gets again, and so on.
He said, surprise...yes!
Once again I heard that I'm still thinking like I'm on a diet, and not feeding myself properly for this training. I KNOW this, but this is all I've known for 10 years now...10 years I've been eating like this, I don't know *how* to eat differently.
A few things we discussed, that I'm implenting on my own this week to see how I do (since it's an off week), and then we'll regroup and see what needs to be done to successfully bring it to training weeks.
- don't get all fat from the same source, vary the type. even if it's healthy fat, apparently it's no good to all come from the same source.
- spread it out (the fat) more throughout the day. I was getting mine in sort of 2 big chunks.
- go easy on the wheat/gluten. I'm trying to find some alternative carb sources that are still quick and easy. Not as easy as it sounds.
- ease off some of the powder. it's convenient yes, and I've got a hectic on-the-go lifestyle and it's HARD to prep everything every single day, so powder has been an easy go-to for a long time. But looking for more solid, real food sources of protein. Trying to remove one powder serving/day.
- vary the macros. This is where I will need some help. i'm running with it on my own this week, but will definitely need some help when training picks back up. We may go to a carb cycle, or we may go to a regular cheat meal (which with time, will theoretically train my body to let go a little more quickly than it does now).
I am really frustrated with myself, for still not getting this. But I do keep forgetting (and relearning) that the goal is now for training and strength. It's going to continue to take some time. I need RC's help in this, particularly because I'm so close in to the meet (I don't have time to be f'ing up and messing with my recovery and ability to train this close) and because we have another commercial shoot coming up for work, either the week before (ugh *excellent* timing right?) or maybe even the week after (is that better? hardly!) the meet. If I'm going to be "camera ready" i've got to maintain..just 3 pounds makes such a huge difference visually on me.
So while I really want to learn this, figure it out and move through it on my own, with all the struggles and frustrations that come with it, I don't have that luxury right now. So once again I need to extend the major major thanks and gratefulness to RC for extending his hand in help.
I will do this, I will be strong, I will not let my emotions get the better of me. Smart and sensible is the best way to go with training and nutrition.
Today - 139.0
Goal is to compete at 136-137
Commercial shoot at 135 or less.
Either way this works out, I'm doing my best. I need to learn how to separate myself and look at me from the "normal" perspective, and the work perspective..but I've yet to figure that one out. My friend T has though, and in that regard she is my role model.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
And then, there was rest...
Today was my last heavy day for a week. I've been looking forward to this day both for the intensity of the day and for the week of "light" that comes after.
Friday I did shoulders, and supersets for bis/tris, and some ab work. I snuck in about 25 minutes of cardio too.
Saturday was REST. I SLEPT. Holy crap I slept and it was *major*fabulousness* I completely conked out around 9:30 Friday night and slept SOLID through the night until 7:30am. I NEEDED this! I fought the urge to hit some cardio later in the day, I knew I just needed to rest. That's a tough battle when my head is in the place that it's in, but I won out yesterday, and I'm glad I did :)
Last night I slept really well again, I think with these two nights combined I slept more than I did all week. A real win for me, just incredible :)
I hit the gym this morning for my last heavy day - deads. I was really bummed to find that I had left my camera at work, so I have no training vids from today, but it was another check in the major WIN category.
Today's deadlift training went down like this...
230 x 5
260 x 3
290 x 1+
So min reps for 290 was just to get the one, anything else = icing on the cake. I've never gone this heavy for reps ever, totally new territory for me. I had to work hard not to let just the NUMBER psyche me out, nevermind what it looked like all loaded on the bar!
230 x 5 went up, harder than I expected. I just took it as a warmup. Which worked well, because 260 x 3 went up easier than I expected (based on the 230). Then it was time...
290...hah! I had looked at the numbers last night and thought "if I could get 5...that'd be really golden. Six and I'd be on cloud 9!"
I got 5! It's certainly not a PR in terms of calculated 1RM, but a huge mental PR for me. I put it down after 5. I probably could have squeezed a 6th out but it wouldn't have done anything for me but to completely and utterly destroy my CNS ;) Soooo I decided against it relatively quickly. *FIVE* x 290 pounds. I felt totally exhilarrated (i have no idea how to spell that) and totally wasted at the same time! Interesting :)
One of the things in addition to maintaining a solid arch in the back (which is tough after 1 or 2 reps, something I definitely need to work on...helloooo rack pulls!) that Myles looks for is a "vertical bar" throughout the lift. Keeping the bar in close, not letting it get out in front of you adding somewhat of a horizontal component to the lift. Today, while I don't have video, I do have photographic "proof" of vertical bar through the lift!
Scratch marks from my nails up my thighs, and some nice bruises to boot, hah :) Sexaaaaay ;)
I took a time-out, about 5 minutes, and then hit the rest of my workout as planned.
Good Mornings
2 x 12 @ bar
Front Squats
8 @ 85
10 @ 75
Leg Press
3 x 8 @ 270
Machine Hip Adduction
2 x 12 @ 170
DB Walking Lunges
2 x 24 steps @ 20
Standing Calf Raises
3 x 12 @ 150
Seated Curls
2 x 8 @ 95
Seated Extensions
2 x 10 @ 95
20 mins cardio - slow walk on TM w/incline
I ate when I came home, and then got in the bed ;)
I didn't really sleep but definitely just laid there in total lethargy, and it was goood, hahah.
I look forward to my deload this week. Nothing heavier than 60%, really very much needed, and I don't think I've ever appreciated it as much as I think I'm going to this week!
One full training cycle left, then my next meet! Bring it on, June 19!
Friday I did shoulders, and supersets for bis/tris, and some ab work. I snuck in about 25 minutes of cardio too.
Saturday was REST. I SLEPT. Holy crap I slept and it was *major*fabulousness* I completely conked out around 9:30 Friday night and slept SOLID through the night until 7:30am. I NEEDED this! I fought the urge to hit some cardio later in the day, I knew I just needed to rest. That's a tough battle when my head is in the place that it's in, but I won out yesterday, and I'm glad I did :)
Last night I slept really well again, I think with these two nights combined I slept more than I did all week. A real win for me, just incredible :)
I hit the gym this morning for my last heavy day - deads. I was really bummed to find that I had left my camera at work, so I have no training vids from today, but it was another check in the major WIN category.
Today's deadlift training went down like this...
230 x 5
260 x 3
290 x 1+
So min reps for 290 was just to get the one, anything else = icing on the cake. I've never gone this heavy for reps ever, totally new territory for me. I had to work hard not to let just the NUMBER psyche me out, nevermind what it looked like all loaded on the bar!
230 x 5 went up, harder than I expected. I just took it as a warmup. Which worked well, because 260 x 3 went up easier than I expected (based on the 230). Then it was time...
290...hah! I had looked at the numbers last night and thought "if I could get 5...that'd be really golden. Six and I'd be on cloud 9!"
I got 5! It's certainly not a PR in terms of calculated 1RM, but a huge mental PR for me. I put it down after 5. I probably could have squeezed a 6th out but it wouldn't have done anything for me but to completely and utterly destroy my CNS ;) Soooo I decided against it relatively quickly. *FIVE* x 290 pounds. I felt totally exhilarrated (i have no idea how to spell that) and totally wasted at the same time! Interesting :)
One of the things in addition to maintaining a solid arch in the back (which is tough after 1 or 2 reps, something I definitely need to work on...helloooo rack pulls!) that Myles looks for is a "vertical bar" throughout the lift. Keeping the bar in close, not letting it get out in front of you adding somewhat of a horizontal component to the lift. Today, while I don't have video, I do have photographic "proof" of vertical bar through the lift!
Scratch marks from my nails up my thighs, and some nice bruises to boot, hah :) Sexaaaaay ;)
I took a time-out, about 5 minutes, and then hit the rest of my workout as planned.
Good Mornings
2 x 12 @ bar
Front Squats
8 @ 85
10 @ 75
Leg Press
3 x 8 @ 270
Machine Hip Adduction
2 x 12 @ 170
DB Walking Lunges
2 x 24 steps @ 20
Standing Calf Raises
3 x 12 @ 150
Seated Curls
2 x 8 @ 95
Seated Extensions
2 x 10 @ 95
20 mins cardio - slow walk on TM w/incline
I ate when I came home, and then got in the bed ;)
I didn't really sleep but definitely just laid there in total lethargy, and it was goood, hahah.
I look forward to my deload this week. Nothing heavier than 60%, really very much needed, and I don't think I've ever appreciated it as much as I think I'm going to this week!
One full training cycle left, then my next meet! Bring it on, June 19!
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Squat Practice Paying Off...I Think :)
For weeks now I've ignored my 5-3-1 training protocol and have just been busting ass with VOLUME for squats. The thought being that I need to imprint the movement, make the the muscles remember themselves how to squat correctly, without me having to constantly baby step myself through every movement in the lift.
So literally I've KILLED myself with reps with moderate weight the past several weeks. Today I returned...I'm in my 1+ week of the training cycle and decided to go with the set/rep scheme I'd be doing if I was following the plan.
Warmups, then 5 x 130, 3 x 150, 1+ x 165
Former best was 160 x 7 and today was... *drumroll* 165 x 8 :)
More weight AND more reps, woot!
Here are all 3 sets:
130 x 5 (which apparently turned out to be 4, hahah ;)
150 x 3
The finale..165 x 8 :)
The goal was every rep every time, no GM'ing out of the hole and with the exception of 2 reps across all 3 sets I think I did :) now granted it's only a total of 16 reps but still! Huge improvement...paying off, so excited for June! :)
Next week is deload, and when I come back from that I'll be on 5-3-1 for a full cycle with squats, and we'll really see how this has worked!
I also did Rack Pulls again, from a platform this time for better bar positioning. I did 2 sets convential style and the last set Sumo style thinking I'd have more specificity, but reading a response I got from Myles earlier has me thinking on that some more...
Here's the 3rd set (Sumo Style):
More to come on diet/weight woes and wins but right now I'm off to softball..possibly 2 games tonight. Could be a late night...!
So literally I've KILLED myself with reps with moderate weight the past several weeks. Today I returned...I'm in my 1+ week of the training cycle and decided to go with the set/rep scheme I'd be doing if I was following the plan.
Warmups, then 5 x 130, 3 x 150, 1+ x 165
Former best was 160 x 7 and today was... *drumroll* 165 x 8 :)
More weight AND more reps, woot!
Here are all 3 sets:
130 x 5 (which apparently turned out to be 4, hahah ;)
150 x 3
The finale..165 x 8 :)
The goal was every rep every time, no GM'ing out of the hole and with the exception of 2 reps across all 3 sets I think I did :) now granted it's only a total of 16 reps but still! Huge improvement...paying off, so excited for June! :)
Next week is deload, and when I come back from that I'll be on 5-3-1 for a full cycle with squats, and we'll really see how this has worked!
I also did Rack Pulls again, from a platform this time for better bar positioning. I did 2 sets convential style and the last set Sumo style thinking I'd have more specificity, but reading a response I got from Myles earlier has me thinking on that some more...
Here's the 3rd set (Sumo Style):
More to come on diet/weight woes and wins but right now I'm off to softball..possibly 2 games tonight. Could be a late night...!
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